“There’s nothing anyone can do to help you!”

That was more or less the message we were given when Ben arrived in our lives, having been born with severe, complex disabilities.

No one actually said those words, of course, but that was what we were left with at almost every turn.

The conversations were mainly focused on all of Ben’s “problems” and how there really wasn’t a fix to those problems.

It was easy to get caught up in all that negativity, to believe that’s all there was. For a long time, we had no idea what path to follow, or if a path existed at all.

With so few giving us much hope, we relied on brute force to get things done and help Ben succeed.

After a few years of that exhausting pace, where it was just me and Jan against the world, so-to-speak, we realized we needed help. We couldn’t do this all our own.

It wasn’t good for our health.

It wasn’t good for our relationship.

And our kids were certainly not...